I realized I'm being really negative nowadays. 'Coz I care too much. Yeap. I care everything too much. From my mom's perspective, it's called narrow-minded. I never realized the virus is back haunting me again. Without me noticing, it's going worse.
I feel like COL. It's so hard to take everything up and keep it with me. Shouldn't have care for something that is totally worthless. Think too much, can be a big problem too. *grin* And yet, I still dislike it. Dislike those things that makes me felt miserable. Along my way, they keep hindering me. I fell. It's a pain.
Standing at the border line of survive and be a living dead person, I'm struggling.
Why choose? Why suffer? Why this and that???
It's for my own good, I told myself. Every step I take should be firm and strong. Just like what the instructor told us, don't relax when you shouldn't. If you did, you will be forcing yourself unconsciously and at last, you'll get hurt.
Yes, it's going to be painful now but that's okay.. Pain is temporary. But death is forever. I wouldn't allow my life to have too much regrets. How do I know? The future is not to seen or predictable. Maybe the next second I'll lost my conscious. When I think back my life, at least... AT LEAST, let me see that I've live well.
Despite those shadows, the lights are there for me.
::FIN::
0 star✰shines on "The Border"
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